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Free food and a personal appearance by Barry Penner? I’m surprised the crowd isn’t bigger!

Although, judging by the look on Barry Penner’s face, perhaps the food isn’t all that appetizing to begin with…

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Barry Penner is about to lose a finger.

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allbusinessSome people find fishing to be relaxing. Not Barry Penner, though. He is constantly worrying if his cool shades are enough to make up for the dorky life jacket. I think it’s iffy, but the nonchalant hand on the hip puts him over the top.

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Barry Penner just announced a new Geocaching program! Cool!

What’s Geocaching? What, you mean you don’t know? From the press release announcing the new geocaching program:

Geocaching has become a popular outdoor treasure-hunting game enjoyed throughout the world by adventure seekers equipped with Global Positioning System (GPS) units. Geocachers search for and locate hidden containers called geocaches and then share their experiences online. (…) The GeoTrek 2009 geocache containers will be filled with special tokens, such as pins and collectible coins.

So in other words, it’s kind of like searching for buried pirate treasure, except the X on a map is replaced by your GPS and the chests filled with Spanish doubloons are replaced by tupperware containers filled with  ‘special tokens, such as pins’. Sign me up!

GeoTrek 2009 is a fun way to reduce carbon emissions and discover B.C.’s parks at the same time. One hundred caches will be placed in secret locations across the province for geocachers to discover.

Yeah! Reduce your carbon emissions by driving around the province looking for hidden treasure! The locations are secret, so make sure you drive EVERYWHERE! It’s green!

“This is an excellent opportunity to get outside and enjoy the adventure of geocaching, while experiencing our amazing network of BC Parks,” said Environment Minister Barry Penner. “It’s an exciting game that’s catching on all over the world and I am delighted to launch this geocaching innovation right here in B.C.”

Wow, Minister Penner, this newly launched GeoTrek 2009  ‘innovation’ is in no way similar to the GeoRush 2008 you launched last year!

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Okay, so that whole ‘no work zone’ thing just won’t die. The latest? Barry Penner has swooped in and put everything right.

“I have instructed my deputy to remove the plasma TV and video games and convert that room into a meeting space,” said Environment Ministry [sic] Barry Penner. “The Nintendo Wii is going and the table and chairs are coming in.”

See, problem solved. The plasma TV and video games are gone, which means the money that was wasted to buy them is no longer wasted! It’s that simple.

He said he’s leaning toward keeping the ping-pong tables because they provide physical exercise for staff.

Physical excercise is good, so therefore the having ping-pong tables in government offices is good. What else do you want ministry staff to do while they are on the job if not exercise? I know that’s all I do at work.

And the “No Work Zone” sign on the front door of the place? “That’s being taken down and sent to the dumpster.” – Canwest News Service

I guess the sign wasn’t recyclable. Pity.

So there you have it. Barry Penner has solved the so-called problem. Now let’s never talk of it again.

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